Remember who I was

“I know I hurt you, I was so unkind
I was ungrateful, I wasted your time
But I was young and lost, so lost
See, you took this poor boy and changed his whole life
Granted his wishes and dreams overnight
And I saw stars, they shot me down
But I deserved it, they knocked me out”

Ever woken up from sleep, opened your eyes and realized you’re alive? Of course, we have… Have we ever opened our eyes and wondered “what if I couldn’t wake up?” Ever imagined being out of your body as you watch your mother wake you up? At first, she taps you to stand up, its morning… But you don’t move, she tries again but you’re still… But you’re there telling her “mom, I’m awake”. She rushes to go call your father and and he gets to your bedside and he also tries waking you up… Already realizing what’s going on, your mom begins to cry… You move close to her telling her you’re there with her… You do everything to try and wake up but you just can’t… You’re gone and there’s nothing you can do to soothe your parents’ pain. Ever woken up from sleep, opened your eyes and said a silent prayer for being alive?

“I’m just waking up now, in the tears of the ones I love
It’s quiet, I’ll bet that everybody thinks I’m done
I need to get up now, I’ve been down here far too long
Two years I’ve been lost, now I remember who I was
Who I was, who I was”

Growing up, as a child, I envisioned death as a thing for adults, people that are way older… Lol, a child my brother’s age died and the question “how’s that even possible?” plays in my head anytime I think about it. So I ask, “what crime has a five year old child committed that’d cost him his life?”. I can’t seem to find the answer… So I think again, about those cultists, ritualists, murderers who have caused someone’s untimely death and ask “Do they ever think about their own deaths?”. When you reason about death, it calms you down, it humbles your being. Knowing that some being up there has the power to snap his magnificent fingers and you’re gone, gone forever. If that doesn’t scare you for at least five minutes, then are you human? So, ever opened up your eyes and said a silent prayer for being alive?

“I’m just waking up now, in the tears of the ones I love
It’s quiet, I’ll bet that everybody thinks I’m done
I need to get up now, I’ve been down here for too long
Two years I’ve been lost, now I remember who I was
Who I was, who I was”

A student committed suicide and after the “candlelight” thing, he’s forgotten. Another one was hit by a car, he survived but he died after a few days and after another “candlelight” thing, he’s forgotten. So, have you ever wondered about what happens after we’re gone? The truth is we’re going to be remembered only when they call our names which barely even happens. The shitty stories in the movies that make us believe that people never forget is a lie.We are humans, we will empathize and we’re done. So, what makes us different from the gone and forgotten people? We’re just lucky its not our time yet. So, ever opened your eyes and said a silent prayer for being alive?

Ever imagined being very sick? You open your eyes and you see the thin line holding death from embracing you and then you snap out of it. Do you think of these things? Its a bit saddening? Depressing? But it’s the truth. Sometimes the truth hurts much more than what we believe. Someone I know told me this on New year’s Eve: “its funny how people will send new year messages to their friends and family but still won’t see the new year”. Now this scared the hell out of me. So, have you ever opened up your eyes and said a silent prayer for being alive?